I’ve been thinking

It’s coming up on a month since I moved to Vancouver. I moved to Vancouver for a couple different reasons. For one, it’s where my Dad lives, and the place I was born. Before, I had been living with my mom and my grandmother in Shreveport, Louisiana. In addition to coming to live with my dad, I felt like I needed to move away from Louisiana. I was sure that whatever it was I was looking for was not there. Why would I continue you to live somewhere that wasn’t good enough, in my eyes.

Well, here I am, Vancouver. Still searching for what it is that I am lacking. Certainly, a change of scenery will do the trick. Of course, that’s not how things work. Up until this point I’ve been forgetting one crucial bit of information that I need. That is: What exactly am I looking for? This is the first step. The first step I decided to skip over. 

I’ve been proceeding,  but without the basis on which to stand. I don’t have the foundation to build on with my actions. What I really wanted was to leave Louisiana, but for what reason? I couldn’t tell you. What I know is that I live in Vancouver for the summer, and in the fall I will be attending College in Oregon. So, I’ve begun to build, but with nothing concrete to build on.

All I can do is take this time to continue to construct myself. The only thing I have control over in my life is every thing I do. I’ve put myself in this position, so I might as well continue down this path. I know now that the answers to what I’ve been searching for can only be answered by me.